Yay, 2012!!!

I can't say 2011 was a great year, it had many great parts, but right now I am still reminded of many hardships that it also brought.

Trevor turned 9 this year. He seems lost on who he is supposed to be. He loves being a big kid, and doing all that comes with a bigger kid (staying up a little later, going to scouts, riding his bike out of the circle alone, etc) at the same time though, he still loves being a little kid. He will sit down and play with "baby toys" and actually enjoy it. He has struggled with reading comprehension, even though he reads every night, this just isn't his strong subject. He on the other hand is great at spelling and math. He has liked being in fourth grade a lot, and he is getting better at helping me without being asked, and is a really great kid. It will be interesting to see what the double digits brings. He has liked playing soccer again this year, and has done awesome, but he has found a new love....swimming!

Dilan turned 7 this year. I missed his birthday blog, but he is an amazing kid. He is so sweet and lovable. He is growing up too, and has realized that it isn't all its cracked up to be. He really struggled starting first grade, because he was gone all day, and he missed me...ha ha I really had to point out it was boring at home, and we don't get to do the "fun stuff" he does at school. He does really great in school though, and he seems to enjoy it for the most part. He loves reading, but finds it more fun to play with his Batman toys than read. He is also a really great older brother, and is so willing to help everybody ;)He is really good at soccer when he wants to be, but if he decides to keep playing, he has the talent to exceed in this sport.

Bryson turned 5 this year. He is growing up faster than his body can keep up. He is in afternoon kindergarten and loves it! He is doing really well, and has been reading since the first day of school. Even though he one of the youngest in his class, his teacher has said he is one of the smartest, even suggested getting him tested (which we declined) He is a ladies man, and loves everybody and everything. His favorite color is pink, and he is very proud of it. He is an amazing older brother to his little sister. He will play with her for hours, and will make sure she has her needs met. It still amazes me with how great this little kid is, and how far we have come! He will do great things one day if he can learn to trust who he is, because he has the personality to charm anybody, and the smarts to get wherever he wants to in life.

Tyler turned 3 this year. We started potty training at the beginning of the year, and once he finally gave in and got it, he has done awesome! He is a little obsessive compulsive. He likes things to be done a certain way and at a certain time. He really struggles if things aren't done this way, and why I think preschool isn't just a want, but a need. He started preschool in September and has loved it. He still struggles sometimes, but his teachers are amazing, and I usually will give them a heads up on how the morning has gone to any issues he might be having. He has come so far already though, and I think the rest of the year will be a good one. He had his first program and was so excited! His loves right now are Mickey Mouse and Mario. He is a really great kid, and is still so mellow, unless things are out of order :) I try to make things out of order a lot to try to teach him that things can be different everyday.....I can try? He got new underwear for Christmas, he was not happy! He cried about his Mickey underwear for three days, and how much he missed them. He finally understood they were too small, and has finally moved on to new underwear being okay. He really is a sweetie, and a great kid though, and I love how vocal he is becoming, he is pretty dang funny.

Kairi turned one this year. She is only one, but because of her hair, she looks three. Many people don't believe me when I say she is only 20 months. She acts like she is already two though. She can say a lot of words, and loves throwing a good tantrum. She had her first time out, and I have to say she made me laugh the whole time she was in there. She is one crazy little girl. She is into everything all the time! She follows me everywhere! It is impossible to clean with her around. She is always into whatever you are trying to clean, or pulling everything back out. She is a MESS! She is an Ipad expert and can find and play any game. She loves babies and is a girl, but she also loves trucks, balls and trains. She is a picky eater, but will try anything. She loves her binkie, and has had it the longest of any of our kids. She screams binkie when it is bed time, and its so cute when she finds or gets one. She loves her bed, and will still take a 2 1/2 to 3 hour nap in the afternoon, my sanity time :) She loves her brothers, and can get them to do about anything for her. We love her, and I am so glad we made the hard decision to go through and have our fifth kid, she was well worth it! I can't wait to see what this year brings out in her...ha ha

Spencer is still working for Cache Valley Electric. He has been made QC (quality control) over a new job site. He is a hard worker, and does so much for our family. He is so supportive and an amazing dad. We celebrated out 10th anniversary this year, best 10 years of my life! I made a goal to read 36 books at the beginning of the year, and I completed this goal on New Years eve :) I also helped our ward team get to second place in region basketball and volleyball.
I have had a hard year though. In May I not only learned that my mom had breast cancer, but that my sister had endometrial serous carcinoma. My mom had a lumpectomy in July and started 16 rounds of radiation in August. She got an infection in her breast that has taken a long time to heal, and still isn't quite there. She so far is clear with her cancer, but only time will actually tell. She had chest pains last month, and we took her to the ER. Her heart was having issues, and she ended up having surgery to get a stent put in. Sleeping over night in the hospital was a surreal experience and way to close to home for me. It hasn't been that long since I was in the hospital with my dad dealing with Cancer and Heart issues. There is nothing that puts more perspective to life that seeing somebody you love go through heart issues and cancer in the same year, and the reality of loosing my mom has been more than I ever want to admit too. While watching my mom go through her cancer I also had to watch my sister go through uterine cancer. She had a full hysterectomy in June, and started Chemotherapy in July. She has always been a strong person, but watching her face the unknown of her future, made me realize just how strong she really is. She took on her cancer, and looked it straight in the face, and kicked its butt! She had to do four rounds of chemo, and she lost all her hair. She also got chemo rash, bubbled fingernails, sensitive teeth and many other uglies that come with chemo. On top of chemo she also had to do a few radiation treatments, basically burning her insides. She is getting her hair back, but she was actually really cute bald too. It hasn't been an easy road for her, but she is a fighter and an inspiration that life gives us really hard things to go through, but we can make it through anything if we really want to. I am just glad she is so far cancer free, and around, because she is a really great sister.
2012 can bring anything besides cancer, heart issues, or death and I will be more than happy. After all that I have been given though, especially my family, I have realized that it isn't what life throws at us, but who is there by us. I have some great friends, and I have realized this year more than any other, that not all friends are here forever. Sadly, some are only supposed to be here for a little time, but its the ones that will always be there no matter what that we need to trust and hold on to. This year I really want to focus on me again, and finally not feel selfish doing it. Finding me again is important to everybody around me, especially my family and friends. In finding me, I hope to find a better mom for my kids, wife for my wonderful husband, sister and daughter for my family, and friend for all those that are still in my life. 2012, I hope I am ready, so bring it on!

on another note, I am going to start a new blog with a shorter title :) and I am going to make it private for the protection of my kids :) cause man, I sure do love them!